Cap In Trade... Pfft... My Caps Are Priceless

I'll Be At DiCo's Tonight

Gold prices are going up and now you can take full advantage!

Your dog's teats are soooo big...... Rescued dogs that have nursed pups so much that shelter managers are concerned that saggy dog boobies may turn off potential dog adopters. Boob jobs for all!

Awful Library Books. These ARE truly awful library books. Almost as bad as "Daddy Drinks Because You Cry" and this one.

Expressionist interpretation of classic video game screens.

The Internet For Beginners



Sometimes you just need one.

Look- you're already pregnant. Why not have a cock shaped body pillow?

Creeper in My Apartment. I would pee myself, I do believe!


On a final note. Pugs who ate their owners! (who were dead)...

Back In Ohio- Home of the Browns and Chain Resaurants

While driving up Wolf Ledges road on the way to ge transcripts from Akron U, I saw an Olds Cutlass similar to this with historical plates. This is the way to get away with avoiding emissions checks and plate renewals in Ohio. I wonder how the kid gets around the mileage restrictions. My grandmother had one of these in silver when I was a kid. Its silver paint eventually peeled off of the roof and hood in the way that only GMs can allow. It also had vent windows in all four of the doors. To save costs on the car it was delivered without roll down rear windows. This was a brilliant thing considering Grandma would smoke with the windows up even in the summer. That's all right though, her whistling and candies hanging off of the gear shift in a bag made everything A -OK!

I like Carhartt double kneed pants. They allow a few extra weeks without the need for long underwear and the hip pockets are handy. I do have few observations though. I can't understand why have a hammer loop at all if there is only one and it is on the left leg? I also have noted that I snag myself on protruding objects from time to time- gate latches, cabinet pulls for example. I find, considering all of the pockets and doo dads, that it is just the pant leg itself that perpetrates the offense. Never the hip pockets or the hammer loop. Strange.

Jesus and Obama Want You Back In Class

I can not explain how it was that I stumbled upon the page that I viewed that allowed me to grab this screen shot from the Finlandia University athletic section. What is that girl doing with a syringe that has anything to do with athletics? Misplaced from one of the academic pages, or do the Finlandia jocks like to experiment with the juice while playing their co-ed sporting events?

I ran into these motivating ads on facebook. I'm torn whether this mug shot man wants to teach moms new tricks, or if this is the type of man that the targeted ladies can look forward to meeting their first semester back. On the other hand, refinancing your home can be a frightening and complicated experience, so why not let this guy in aforementioned mug shot do the same job that the suits couldn't do without destroying the economy?

This Iced Tea Is Lacking In Pickle Juice. Kosher Pickle Juice.

IT was a balmy day on Mackinac today, as it has been all weekend. At some point this afternoon the mercury reached a blistering 51 degrees down on Biddle point. After the recent storms, the lake level has begun its yearly fall retreat. While the snowmobile may be ready for another winter of ice crossing, it will not be legal to operate until the 15th of November and hopefully weather conditions won't allow that to happen well into December. I like my bike.
This photo was taken on the 2nd or 3rd of November, 2009. All closed up, drained down, put to sleep while the minor internal surgery begins.

A very interesting paper craft mask of a man's own up-scaled head.

Twitter is handy for something, I'm sure, but what it is I still have yet to figure out. At least it can help me know what time it is in London.

Who would have thought that the Dodge Viper logo looks like Daffy Duck when turned upside down.

As if a photo of Salvador Dali walking his anteater out from a Paris subway tunnel wasn't fabulous enough, it can be viewed in a blog that specializes in all things anteater.

Just finished watching Australia on the Showtime. Still don't know how two guys that drive cattle in the Outback for a living can just up a steal a schooner and sail in the ocean to an island to rescue children bombed by the Japanese. At night. I call Bull Shit.

Here is a fun project an interesting artist has created. He draws six images that tell the story of famous movie and you get to guess what that movie is. I only managed about half of them.

Some Make and Beak Engines For You To Enjoy

This video will help explain what a make and break (or hit and miss) engine is, what one would do with such a thing, and how it works.


Here is one in action.


...and another.

Inaugural Podcast Post

The Make and Break Podcast is up and out there floating around in the internets! Join your host Jim Glenstein as he discusses piracy, internet infrastructure, and ancient Egyptian brewing practices with special guest The Chairman of Awesome. Fire up the mp3 player and enjoy your commute a little bit more.

Direct link to Podcast blog.


Some of the Chairman of Awesome's projects
Attack of the Monstrology
Cereal and Pajamas

Things I Enjoy Seeing On Mackinac

I see things while I am out and about living and working on Mackinac Island that would, I guess, require a lot of time spent in the mall if I were to live anywhere else.
Take these anecdotes for examples of these observations.

Last week I saw a couple with their post college age daughter waiting for the next boat off of the island. I was easily about to ascertain that two of them were mother and daughter due to their similarities. These congruences were-

Identical bobbed light brown hair.
Daughter looked like younger version of mom.
Both wore tank tops.
Both wore capri pants.
Both wore white running shoes.
Both shared an identical build.
My mind wandered, thinking of the dad and the possibilities of confusion when telling his wife that he thought she was sexy. (Shudder...)

The family of six (kids aged 4-13), all of whom wore Transitions lenses in their glasses.

The family who wore wife beaters. Ok. Mom was in a tank top. There was in this family an anomaly. The son who wore a comic book t-shirt that clearly broadcast to me, " I'm not with them."

The little girl screaming that she DIDN'T want ice cream.

In years past I have been blessed to see-
A little boy wet himself because his mother was too distracted by bicycle rental rates than her cross-legged son.
Kids having so much fun playing in Marquette Park that one of them vomited, looked down at the mess, shrugged, and continued with the amusing melee.
Seeing at least one pregnant lady a day for an entire summer. The weirdest day was 5 preggos and two pregnant sisters- might have been twins in twins.

I like living here.

Vintage Aircraft Visits Mackinac Island

The Saturday of Labor Day weekend 2009 Mackinac Island was treated by a visit from a WWII era DC-3. It flew in from the east after flying a lap or two around the Mackinac Bridge and was available for tours shortly after landing at the Mackinac Island Airport.

The Water In My Toilet Is Hot

Feet. Many of us have a pair of them. They inspire wonderful words such as, shoes, corns, and bipedalism. I can say that I am a foot enthusiast- as mine get me around pretty well and I like that feature. I protect my leg to earth interfaces with boots or shoes and socks. I walk quite a bit, and living in a town that has outlawed cars, I ride a bike daily. My feets need some covering.
I don't believe that my foot use is beyond rational expectation. I don't wear flip flops. I don't think that anyone else should either. OK. Woman can wear them sometimes because they can be cute about it, but dudes need to cover them dogs. ...hairy toes waggling around all over the place... Put 'em away bro.

I dealt with a maintenance report from a guest the other day that made use brain cells I haven't used in a while. The report stated that the DVD player that had been borrowed from the front desk displayed the film only in black and white. The first question I asked the executive house keeper was whether or not they had been watching a black and white film. Laughter ensued and I took the offending contraption to the maintenance shop for later examination. I decided to just take the miserable thing home and after hooking it up to my own television I put in a test DVD. Color! Well I'll be damned. But wait! No sound. Harrumph! Ah! I had inserted a copy of The Silent Movie.
It turns out the guests had managed to borrow the only B&W film the hotel owns.

Professional Pea Shooters

Who would have known that there was a pea shooting competition? Who would have though that in this competition there would be folks that take it seriously enough to add laser sights to their shooters? Who would have thought that the eventual winner just used a straw?

Smart cars are getting thrown into Dutch canals as pranks!

This makes me sick! Don't take the shots! Just read this! Swine flu is fake. Or not, if it gets worse.

Students build car that charges in 10 minutes... but...

Chicago and Bayview Yacht Races

Now that it is Tuesday, July 28th this season's yacht races are drawing to a close. There seemed to be a fairly large turnout as far as boats are concerned and although the weather has not cooperated 100%, the jovial crowds don't seem to mind. As long as the music is good, the liquor flows, and the ladies are wild, the
sailors don't seem to mind.

Aww!!! Really???

A few summers ago, while enjoying a summer working on Mackinac, I somehow took to noticing pregnant ladies walking, riding, and generally having fun. This awareness that I was experiencing became so obnoxious to me that I did the only thing within my power to quash this observation. I began to make a game of purposefully noticing and then counting this women. I even got a few more people to participate!
Some days it was one. Others it was five. One day I saw two ladies that I'm sure were sisters if not twins, both of whom looked to be about to pop or were carrying twins themselves! That was a banner day.
This summer, now four or five years later, I have unintentionally began to notice something not quite as pleasant as expectant mothers. No- this summer it is formerly expectant mothers who have decided to change their children in inappropriate locations.
Now, I realize that you have to do what you have to do, but at a patio table next to me on the Ice House lawn is not an acceptable place to wipe your child's ass. Outside of Professor Harry's windows blocking half of the Star Line ramp is not cool. A picnic table on Windermere Point is no place to deal with diapers.
I now have more appreciation for those Koala things in rest stops. Bathroom floors are gross, but couldn't one bring a tarp to lay on the floor. After all, your double-wide stroller still has some storage room left.
Thankfully there has been a lull in these particular sightings.

Playing Scrabble With Bjork...

At work, while contemplating the unlikely and possible surreal experience of playing Scrabble with Bjork, it occurred to me that the letter tiles would be different to accommodate the Icelandic alphabet. Now on that vein, what differences are there in the quantity of letter tiles between the Icelandic and English versions?

What would one serve when hosting a Scrabble match to which Bjork has been invited? Cheese and crackers? Fresca? Gold Fish?

Prison artwork that can be used for escape.

Who Pooped? Fun from the zoo!

Transitional Blue Blood. I guess this is a comic or art or something, interesting none the less.

Photos of life in Portland Maine.

A description of "no flash" photography using infra-red light.

Stupid headline from back home.

The Spirit Of Jazz

He'll be inside ya, wearing you like a glove...

Kickin' It Into High Gear

It has been a while since a post and I think these links might be a good addition to the void and fill in the gap until the next legit post.

Thanks to the B3ta newsletter for this lovely interpretation of creation and evolution.

Dinosaurs saying, "hey".


Bawdy Hospital. NSFW.


Awkward family photos.

Terrible Christmas sweaters.

Kid's show explaining history with out beating around the bush.

An Observation- Made To Order BLT Subway Commercial

This idea of made to order BLTs from Subway is, in my opinion, asinine. BLTs are served toasted with mayo and- get this- bacon, lettuce, and tomato.
Now, if Subway is referring to the selections that are available for sub breads, then 'made to order' is pretty boastful. If I may choose between Romain, buttercrunch, and iceberg lettuces, roma, beefsteak and plum tomatoes, hickory, apple, and sticky icky smoked bacon- I rescind my observation and complaint.



I think I see vidalia onion on there... tsk. tsk.






Anything added to this sandwich renders it anything but a BLT. Even though avocado and cranberry chutney are very tasty additions to this sandwich, the creator of said sandwich may feel free to name what ever they like. Just not a BLT.




A proper BLT- and not just because it is made with sliced bread.





Don't get me started on turkey reubens. Its like saying you have a Chevrolet boat.

Stepping Into Modern Times

Using a nearly expired government coupon card, I had a DTV converter sent to the house. Now keep in mind that I don't NEED one of these devices, as I have cable and watch a fair amount of programming on the computer, but I wanted one just in case and I was curious to know how one works- especially in northern Michigan.

My Channel Master 7000 was an easy install, and cosmetically fits in well with my 25 year old stereo and amp. After a scan of all available channels the local PBS station was the only channel that was strong enough to get picked up. I think I will try a better antenna since the one I have currently is literally a length of wire.

I am impressed with the picture quality and all of the features that the digital signals provide- program guides and schedules, and the added programming capabilities and opportunities of the digital tiers.

While semi-pointless, I now know more about the DTV debacle and if something happens to the cable I and my 20 year old TV will be ready. All for $12.95.

David Sedaris Is Now Famous Enough To Be Impersonated

It's a Series Of Tubes!

Ted Stevens, the man who immortalized the idea that the internet is not a truck, has been cleared of the charges that resulted in the defamation of his name and the destruction of his livelihood. While serving as a Republican Senator for the state of Alaska, charges of receiving illegal gifts were brought against him in 2008. This was during a Republican administration against a Republican. Now the 'doddering old man' is clear of all charges. What gives me the impression that Ted was thrown under the bus and left behind? Why do I think that there was something else going on?
After all- one year ago, this man was one of the most hated men in America, and now is cleared of all shame. Hmm...

Come On Magic Eight Ball!

No More Ice Bridge To St. Ignace!

Two days of steady 30 mph winds blowing out of the east have wreaked their havoc on the ice that covered the Straights of Mackinac. Around noon today ice west of the bridge let loose after a relentless push. This made room for the wind to blow all of the ice south of the Humbard trail under the bridge and allowed for a huge amount of pack ice to blow in from the void of Lake Huron. The pack ice was scooting along the shore at Windermere Point traveling an easy 15 mph- too fast to casually keep up with on a bike apparently.
I took some photos of the events from Sunset Rock.
Are you wondering if pagans or hippies visited the beach this summer? I think it was hippies.

facebook Power Consumption

I filmed this and posted it just to waste server space and help out with facebook's $1,000,000 a month electricity bill. Here's to the energy saving paperless society!

My Shades Are Too Small To Cover The Blinds- I'll Keep Them On My Face.

Some fun Podcasts that I have been listen to lately are good enough to share.
You Look Nice Today- A Journal of Emotional Hygiene. "You Look Nice Today is an audio-based Journal of Emotional Hygiene, staffed by lonelysandwich, scottsimpson, and hotdogsladies.
The three hosts met on Twitter.com, and soon realized that none of them had anything better to do than this. And Twitter."

The Bugle is a Times Online podcast that features John Oliver (The Daily Show) and Andy Zaltzman. A weekly news round up that features Hotties From History.

Psuedopod brings you the best short horror in audio form, to take with you anywhere. It's pretty good- wouldn't call it 'horror' though. Nice fiction.

Uhh Yeah Dude. More guys sitting around being nutty.

All of these great podcasts are available for free on iTunes.

Ethel Merman disco mp3 sample track! Oh how I wish I were 15 years older.

I like socks- good socks. Man oh man! So do these guys!

While we discuss haberdashery, let me show you an instructional video for the putting on of pants.

How many camels fit into a Subaru? No really-

Which describes how you're feeling all the time? Let Pac Man help describe.

Catfish and hot chicks. It turns out the ladies enjoy catfish noodling too!

The International Jurassic Park Erotic Fan-Fiction Writer's Association. You have to be kidding. Not only is the idea for the page terrible, the actual page itself is horrid. 1997 horrid.

Let's make drugs!

The hypnic jerk is the reaction one has after having that 'falling feeling' when falling asleep. Man- does this happen to me all of the time.

At-Ats in the home and in the park!

Scanwiches. Scans of sandwiches. Don't ask. Its good.

Neat bikes in NYC! Fun bikes! Tall Bikes! Tough bikes!

A trip to Chernobyl. Eerie.

Don't give your dog an enema in the park.

Photos of Russian history superimposed on Russia of the present.

I Got Teh Fever!

Here is a Model Die Casting 0-6-0 that I threw together a few weeks back. It is not a model of any particular prototype, but was fun none the less. I built up the coal bunker on the tender to more closely resemble something that may have been found on the Duluth, South Shore, and Atlantic.
I am trying to find a model close enough to the monster in the b&w photo to make one or two of them. They were 2-8-2 Mikados purchased used from the New York Central and were the largest steam locos to run on the DSS&A. I don't know if they ever made their way into St. Ignace, but I'm sure they would have been quite a sight! I'm holding out for just the right starting point to recreate these locos. Not just any mikado model will do! Any tips?

The Donuts Must Be Fried

The weather above the 45th parallel in Michigan has been a bit warm. Just warm enough to melt down the hard packed snow on the roads of Mackinac Island and with some judicious plowing the State Park boys and Mr. Horn have allowed for bikers to ride with caution.
The ice around the island has seen better days, but is still relatively intact, and has its good and bad days. Today the island was hammered with a rather stiff east wind and blew a bunch of pack ice back into the open water that had formed around the lighthouses.
On St. Patrick's day Mr. Bynoe organized a broom hockey game on Windermere point with two teams with three person rotations and a few spectators.

After Eight Weeks of Oil, This Latex is For Apes.

Parrots, I am told, have emotions and feelings. They must also like Ray Charles.


This screen shot is real. The Scrabble web page has a word of the day that must be well humored or have a poor editor.

I always follow Steve's Ways To Be Cool.

Eighteen Wheels of Justice!

Hamburger Pie Requires An Egg

I saw Watchmen in Mount Pleasant on Friday and enjoyed myself. While I am still convinced that no one will see this film thanks to marketing aimed towards lovers of the graphic novel leaving the uninitiated lost and bewildered, it was a lot of fun- even with the rather odd sex scene. Night Owl going to town on The Silk Spectre is one thing, but instead of a good pile driving the action mimicked an ultra sonic jewelery cleaner. Awkward.
Baffling fornication aside, the movie did a nice job placing camera angle to reproduce the books artwork and the action scenes, while rather gory, are well done and express the pint they are trying to make.
Enough of that.

Pranks for remodelers.


A list of Star Wars quotes made better by replacing a word with 'pants'

Aww... White mice playing little tiny instruments. Or are they giant mice playing regular sized... Oh dear god!

Can't get the old boyfriend off of the couch away from the Play Station? Here is your cure for that stinking lazy bastard.

That Guy ruining (or perfecting?) good memories.
Here is one of me. Being That Guy.



Bow down to you masterful overlord!

If you live in the Louisville area and have a particular need, this guy will perform the services that you require. For free! NSFW- but tastefully funny. No pun intended.

Stick-on tattoos gone wrong.

"I put 2222 toothpicks in my beard!"


A brilliant representation of people organized by stereotype. Spending the time to look at them all is well worth it.

A story written by a former San Francisco school teacher that was dosed with LSD during field trip. I feel it necessary to repeat that he was dosed without his knowledge.

What does the 3 year old art critic have to say?

She's looking for a husband and has a few requirements.

He has a cat on his head- and it likes to be there.


Flat bottomed tacos. I like my tacos to have a bit of a rounded bottom if I do say so...

This Just Doesn't Pass Mustard

Here are some various photos taken on Mackinac Island this last week.
They include a very premature robin in a tree, shots of the Iroquois Hotel from the ice and the Bernida under wraps on the Arnold coal dock. Have a click, have a look.





































This shot is of down town Mackinac Island MI on an average Friday when the ice is safe enough for visitors to cross on their snowmobiles. I stopped counting sleds at 65.